10 Reasons Why Young People Should NOT Travel
I originally posted this on my other site TravelMore but since people seemed to like it so much, I am reposting it here. Enjoy!
There is an unreported drug epidemic going on with young people right now. It is a dangerous new high that is 100% legal, extremely addicting, instantly available for purchase online, pretty affordable, and extremely delicious. What is this new super drug?
Law enforcement officials are calling it “travel” but it often goes by the street names “backpacking”, “couch surfing”, “studying abroad”, or “finding yourself”.
“Travel” is known to produce an extremely euphoric natural high that becomes addictive almost instantly. Often times travel addicts will quit their jobs, sell all their possessions, abandon their relationships, and embark on year long journeys to find the purest “travel” high.
On college campuses, talk to any student and they will tell you how easy it is to get your hands on some “travel”. Often times, it is sold directly by the school disguised as an educational study abroad program, but really it is just another form of “travel”! Most college students openly admit to casually experimenting with “travel” while on spring break and it is extremely common for friends to say “Hey bro, want to travel this summer? Trust me it isn’t a big deal. Everyone else is doing it. How dangerous can it be?”.
However as a recovering travel addict, take it from me, real friends don’t let other friends travel. Your friends may look cool on Instagram while they are high on “travel”, climbing Machu Picchu or eating Pad Thai in Thailand, all while you are currently reading this post bored out of your mind at work, but if everyone else jumped off a bridge would you? No!
My only hope is that this list of reasons NOT TO TRAVEL encourages some young impressionable minds to think twice before taking their first hit of “travel”.
If you know someone who is thinking about traveling, addicted to travel, or is on the verge of traveling, PLEASE SHARE this vital post with them before it is too late!
Also if you have any more reasons why people shouldn’t travel or personal experiences dealing with “travel addicts”, please share in the comments below!
10 Reasons Why Young People Should NOT Travel
1) You Can See Everything On Television, Instagram, or Wikipedia
Technology has made it possible for us to experience everything from the comfort of our phones. For goodness sakes, there is even an entire TV channel & app dedicated to just travel.
So why on earth would you ever leave your house when the world can come to your 5 x 3 screen and you can then show your appreciation by liking or retweeting it?
Better to let the professionals like Rick Steves, Anthony Bourdain, and Andrew Zimmern travel the world while you sit on your sofa playing Candy Crush.
2) You Have A Real Job With Real Responsibilities
If you quit you job and travel the world, who is going to do all your essential work tasks like gchatting with your friends all day? You can’t train someone else to do that! It would be weird!
Sure for the time being your job is pretty pointless and completely unfulfilling but if you keep at it for another 5-10 years, you will finally make it to middle management where you will get the privilege of managing annoying young people like yourself!
Also if you left your job, who would your co-workers go to when they had questions about Excel? You spent years learning every single Excel command and now you are just gonna throw that life skill away? I don’t think so!
3) The World Is An EXTREMELY Dangerous Place
Oh you don’t believe me? HAVE YOU SEEN TAKEN?!?
These days thanks to ISIS, the entire world is basically at Threat Level Midnight.
Thinking about going to the Middle East? Well don’t because Iran probably has a nuclear bomb. You want to go to Europe? Well hopefully you speak Russian because half the continent has been invaded and the Euro is about to collapse. Africa? one word: EBOLA. What about Asia, it is nice this time of year right? False, the entire continent is still 100% radioactive thanks to the Fukushima disaster. I guess South America is probably your best bet as long as you don’t mind being a drug mule.
Overall, it is best to just stay home and play it safe because if you ever leave your home country, you are guaranteed an all but certain gruesome death.
4) You Already Have Enough Friends
If you travel, you will undoubtedly meet some new people and you might even unintentionally enjoy their company.
Worst case scenario, you might actually become friends with them. Then you are basically screwed because you will be obligated to add them all on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat and then constantly have to “like” their posts. Ain’t nobody got time for that!
Even worse, imagine if your new international friends came to visit your country, they would probably want to stay with you. No thanks!
5) Flying Is So Uncomfortable
Have you been on a plane in recent years?
It is absolutely terrible! Small seats, no leg room, no wifi, terrible food, annoying passengers.
Yes, it is true that we can now get almost anywhere in the world within 24 hours and that people used to sail 3 months across the entire ocean in a cramped boat with the threat of potential death to do the exact same thing, but at least those people didn’t have to deal with the TSA!
6) Foreign Food Will Make You Sick
Unless you are planning on bringing a suitcase full of food, don’t travel because the food is completely different abroad!
If you want a fix of authentic foreign food, I suggest simply going to Olive Garden, Noodles & Company, Taco Bell, Panda Express, or Chipotle. It is far cheaper and you won’t get any parasites or diarrhea (although Taco Bell is highly questionable).
Also if you travel abroad, there is no guarantee that they will have Yelp. Would you really want to risk eating at a restaurant that hasn’t been thoroughly peer reviewed by pretentious foodies? Didn’t think so!
However the absolute worst thing is that according to factual stories I read online, many non-western countries eat weird things like dogs. Do you really want to be eating a meat dish and wondering if you are eating Sparky?
7) Like Everyone Doesn’t Speak Perfect English
Like think about how frustrating it is when you go to like your local 7-11 convenience store and they like don’t speak English good. Like now multiply that by like 1000 and you like have the rest of the world. Like I personally would never want to like talk with someone that can’t like speak English good because it is like annoying. Seriously people need to like learn English good or whatever, otherwise I like can’t even understand them.
8) Traveling Is Expensive
If you are young, the best thing you can do is work hard and save your money so you can afford to buy a nice new car and big house. Those are physical items that scream “HEY LOOK AT ME! I AM SUCCESSFUL!“. Seriously what would you rather invest in: yourself or some awesome new possessions?
Plus if you travel when you are young, you are certain to go broke because traveling is extremely expensive.
Just think about it: You already spend $1,000 a month on your apartment, $300 on your car, plus $100 on your cell phone, and that isn’t even factoring in last month’s credit card bill and that $100 round of drinks at the bar last weekend.
Not to mention you absolutely cannot afford to travel if you want to buy the new Apple Watch when it comes out next week, so please be smart and save your money for the things that you REALLY NEED!
9) Travel Is A Gateway Drug
You know that travel bug thing your Aunt Lindsay was saying your cousin Maeby caught while she was studying abroad in Spain…..that is a real thing! Seriously, check WebMD.
The worst part is that there is no cure for the travel bug except more travel. So go travel at your own risk because more than likely you will catch the travel bug or even worse, wanderlust, and then there is no turning back.
10) Travel Will Ruin Your Home Life
Say hypothetically you decide not to listen to any of this great advice and risk everything to travel. Some how against all the odds, you manage to have a great time and don’t die. Then what?
You eventually have to return home and once you do, normal life will seem so boring in comparison to traveling that you will spend every waking hour trying to figure out how you can #TRAVELMORE…
This post is SOLID GOLD
I read the first line. Then stopped.
I feel dumber for reading it.